It had been a good day. She was so beautiful, and attentive, and interested. His hope had been kindled on her laughter. He had not felt much of a man for such a long, long while. He had only known her for three months but it had been a whirlwind. He felt thirty again, no maybe forty, that was his prime. He laughed thinking that he had not awakened to that particular stiffness in a long while. His back, his neck, yes stiff every day, just from sleeping. But this was a familiar friend he thought long gone. He felt alive again.
They had traveled to the city on a whim. They could do that now, freed from the obligations of younger folk. And they had eaten the best food and seen the best sites and were alone together in the rich buzz of the city. He never thought that a smile would again ever cross face. Cause, she had died ten years ago suddenly, just as the kids were gone and they were just about to live the life they had talked about all those many years. Travel and freedom! They had saved and they had planned, sacrificing much along the way for the now grown babies they loved so dearly. And just as the new life was about to begin, there came the diagnosis, the disbelief, the panic, the treatment, the decline, the death. Almost overnight it seemed. His world shaken, foundations overturned, numb.
And numb was how he stayed for a long, long while. He went through the motions, pitying his children’s concern. “Why worry about a dead man,” he used to wonder. And to all accounts he was dead, at least the walking dead. Smiling face, dead eyes, keeping up social convention, but more and more reclusive, disconnected. He was lost somewhere between here and there, unable, unwilling to bridge the gap. He replayed the dreams they had shared with each other during the hard times and the good. Dreams of exotic people and places and sunsets and of growing old together. God he had loved her. It was a true and fierce love that had given her a place to rest and grow and nurture the ones they loved so much.
She had knitted each child a little blanket. A covering that saw them through their first six months or so. And each unique blanket had followed each child through Christmas, and Easter, and birthdays, year after year. Upon their leaving there was a special ceremony she designed for each baby that included a blessing and a passing of the blanket. But there was one blanket which had followed them all. It was still waiting with no place to rest. A little red blanket with a white T embroidered on it. She was the youngest, the brightest star whose light had been taken from them. He had discovered it one day going through “the chest” where she had kept all the things that belonged to the future. He wept that day for the first time. Long and deep he grieved, and in utter solitude. But that day was different. On that day he began to make a turn. It was that day he began to let go. He began to finally lift his head.
And it was not long after that day that she suddenly appeared in his life. Bright, full of life, no expectations other than he be fully himself. It was different than they had been. They had grown up together and had overcome and learned much together. The children born of them created a bond that could not be shared with another. He still missed her, and would at times wish for her company and conversation. But she was gone, and she is here and alive and interesting and maybe, just maybe there was some life left before it was over. Maybe just maybe, he could be alive before he died. So as they walked the streets that day, hand in hand, hope was their friend and their guide. They strolled in the park and came upon an elderly lady knitting. Knitting a small red something. A blanket, or a sweater, he did not know. All he knew was the white hot grief for his child who was not. All the hope and disappointment and the triumph of the life he had lived coalesced in that moment. The pain and the joy somehow coexisting. He remembered a line from a song “There are cracks in everything, that’s how the light gets in.” He thought he finally understood, or at least was beginning to. And as the tears ran down his face light broke from his eyes. He muttered “hallelujah” and “amen.” His friend, silent and watching, pulled him close, kissed him sweetly, and sighed in thankfulness for a man with a soul.
This was beautiful. It’s my first time listening to one of your audio pieces. Lovely narration. Simply wonderful.
Thank you. They are all meant to be heard. For good or bad I hear them in a sense as I’m writing. Thank you for being “hear.” 🙂
☺
This is so sad. You really convey it.
Howdy Plato – good to hear you on form and blasting!! You’re a genius!!
How come your posts do not feature in my emails anymore? What do I have to do?
Hello my friend. I am glad you were here. I’ve not posted anything for a little while. Maybe that’s it. And I changed themes a few weeks back. I’ve been working on projects around the house. I pray blessings on you and yours.
Whoa! This moved me…and that’s all I’m gonna say about that. Wonderful write.
Hey my brother. It is good to know you were here. Blessings.
Thank you for sharing such a sensitively written piece. And, thank you for your stubborn optimism! Missed it – my own fault, too. 🙂
Thank you for being here. It says in Proverbs that a live dog is better than a dead lion. 🙂 where there is life, there is hope, I hope.
Beautiful Plato! I love the words, love your voice saying them, and the music. Really enjoyed this sad, sweet, happy story.
Peace,
Mary
Thank you for being here sugar.
All we can do is being grateful for every moment we have here on this spaceship… everything appears and disappears and it goes so fast… and everything is a gift… and so are you. Thank you, Plato.
Hey my friend. I am glad you were here. 🙂
I like the new music behind it. I’m trying to visualize the setting where you’d tell this story. Doesn’t seem right for a smokey club. Hm….
I don’t know. More like a scene in a movie or something
OR how about a weekly mini-program on your FB page? You could write stories and anything, music them all up, and post them on there (and here, too). Maybe you need a weekly feature. 😀 Something you’d have fun with. You could even learn to put in sound affects. My friend Laurie does that on her podcast all the time.
That’s a good idea. Maybe a thought of the week or something.
Maybe worth exploring…
You might try serializing The Dragonfly and the Princess to get everyone’s attention.
Hugs Plato!
Hey darlin
🙂 I have something for you.
What? I’m excited
https://metalflowermaker.wordpress.com/2016/02/23/finishing-a-project-really/
I bow before the gracious gift of your words. I gratefully receive them in humility and out of a recognition of my own need for such gifts. Thank you so. I am glad you like the reading. It is how it hear them. There are so many little flaws in them but that to is how life is, is it not. It is how I want them to be out in the universe. Blessing my friend.
There are no doors on this Groovy preacher like dude’s sanctuary. I’m outside, sitting in a wooded glen, where the sun dances on the path as it filters down through the trees. I’ve come to depend on his voice, because my mind doesn’t read as well as it hears. I listen, sometimes feeling the pain in the words so much that I cry deep sobbing tears. But he always brings me a truth to take away. I saw him happy, I saw him sad, I saw him crushed, I saw him hushed by his own tears. I’m ever thankful to be here. May the Light always shine warm upon this sanctuary.
(You know, I felt exactly the same way. Plato didn’t have the audio up the first I read it and it really made me feel the same things you did, Lois.)
The pain in the written version was conveyed so well, I couldn’t bear to listen to it. Reading it is sufficient to stir in me enough sadness and hope for a long while.
Truly beautiful. And your reading adds so much- it’s like a professional reading. It’s truly very good. Thanks for being able to share it with us.
Thank you for your generous comments. I’m glad you stopped by.
very sad and very real
Thank you for stopping by and for your thoughtful comments.
Just listened to the audio. It’s impossible to not just sit and be still while listening to you read. The story hangs together so perfectly. I doubt I’ll read another tomorrow better than this one. You did a fabulous job, friend.
I am not grinning this time. It is deep to me and sad and real somehow
That is so beautiful and poignant and TRUE. The grieving process is all there and the coming together of death and new life at the end is so amazing the way it happened and the two things became one. And it certainly was about having a soul. And the fact that souls can live, die, and live again if they have a reason to glow. I really actually could identify with a lot of the emotions in it. Terrific writing. Different from other things you’ve done and every bit as poetic.<3